Authors: grist.com FOOD
Everyone is excited, or at least somewhat mollified, about the arrival of fall when they see the seasonal Starbucks menu (or, if you’re lucky, the seasonal menu at an independent coffee shop that’s inspired by Starbucks’ seasonal menu but makes everything taste better). Pumpkin lattes and peppermint mochas ease the pain of short days and freezing your balls off.
Notably, THIS DOES NOT WORK WITH POTATO CHIPS. But nobody told Pringles that. Which is why the world’s premier “potato slurry pressed into a saddle shape” company is debuting festive holiday pumpkin pie spice, cinnamon sugar, and white chocolate peppermint flavors.
We were half-certain this was a hoax, but the folks at Huffington Post tried all of them, which is a good indicator that they exist. (The potato chips, I mean, but also I guess the Huffington Post.) They declared the pumpkin “surprisingly not revolt[ing]” but the white chocolate peppermint “a horrible abomination to humanity,” which sounds about right. I mean, to be overly fair to Pringles, potato is a great ingredient in bread, and I’d probably eat pumpkin or cinnamon sugar potato bread. Maybe even not on a dare. But a) these are not bread and b) white chocolate peppermint would still be mega-gross.
If you really want to try these … fucking evaluate your life. But OK, maybe you smoke a lot of pot or do a lot of YouTube videos where you eat stuff that’s nasty. If so, you should know that these are debuting in November and you can only get the pumpkin pie flavor at Walmart. The rest should be easier to find, at least for the short period before the villagers come after them with torches.